Christina was my guest this time last year on the Abundant Parent Membership. Catch her full workshop here: https://theabundantparent.com/heal-your-inner-voice/
Mom and mindfulness coach, Christina had a full arsenal of tools to support parents and kids in embracing mindfulness practices. She generously spent two hours with me delivering fantistic tool after tool! While also spending time to share her own journey with shame and low confidence.
Mindfulness works! We are seeing it introduced to children in public schools, as well as playing a part in corporate wellness programs. The practices are simple the positive outcomes are undeniable.
Catch the Companion Podcast Here:
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I wasn’t always mindful. As a teenager and young adult I would make fun of people with obvious deficiencies and I would make fun of myself, both out of my history of shame and worthlessness. There was a weird dichotomy between the me that lowered myself and others to compensate for my low self-esteem, and the me that took such pride in helping others in need. At different times one might have witnessed me and interpreted two different people. Looking back I attribute this to a searching for myself, searching for my place in the world, the acceptance of myself through the eyes of others, and a deep disconnect from my inner being, my soul.
It was in that idea of community and family that I learned to fit in.
I remember feeling such intense anguish as a teen. Not in a desperate or depressed way, but in that I felt emotions so deeply. So when I felt low, I would pour myself into writing, singing and at and weep at the expression of it all. I know now that I was an empath taught to live through filters of admissible social conduct. But it was in that idea of community and family that I learned to fit in. And when I learned to fit, I learned to shut off my intuition and inner being. I learned to shut off the very source of self that was given to me to protect me and guide me to live my life’s purpose.
This is when I realized the truest sense of suffering. This living of life with love as means of manipulation and desperate belongingness but not as the greatest guiding force in the Universe. When we being to experience the loss of those closest to us, and we try to replace those connections with other people, we begin to understand the commodity of human emotions. For me, losing my mom at 21 meant understanding there would never be a replacement for the unique love and bond that one shares with a loving parent. Having children helped me understand unconditional love void of ego, And going through a divorce meant understanding how quickly the perception of love can die.
When I began to awaken and embody the full force of mindfulness and consciousness it was when I was willing to take responsibility for the role I played in my understanding of events and my own power to grow and heal. This meant I had to break out of the victim mentality I as was inadvertently taught by my mom. This meant recognizing life wasn’t happening to me, it was happening for me and … It meant I didn’t need to rely on others to rescue me, I could do that all myself.
Loving myself doesn’t mean loving everyone else a bit less.
In someways, being mindful means I’m less self-sacrificing, because I’m pausing and reflecting before responding. It’s about respect and boundaries for myself and also in respecting the journeys of others. It’s been interesting to see how much more peace and calm I bring to my children’s and client’s lives through taking care of myself better. Allowing guilt-free consideration for my own needs and desires. I have the beautiful perspective of understanding loving myself doesn’t mean loving everyone else a bit less, in fact, it’s easier to love everyone else, including those who hate me. Love is a bottomless well when you truly tap into it.
When I became awakened to a broader perspective I understood the power in slowing down and putting intention behind the efforts I was making out in the world. And when I put intention behind mindfulness practices every one and everything around me got better. When you understand everyone is the hero of their own story and that it’s not your job to change their mind, when you release the grasp ego plays in your need to be accepted and approved of, and when you love yourself first, the way you always deserved to be love, you find you can lead by example, and model the loving light you’d like your own children to carry into their adulthood.
You can catch all the full workshops in the Abundant Parent membership. www.theabundantparent.com/membership
Author of “Where the Light Is… A Parent’s Guide,” and best selling author Leah Recor is a mother of two young girls, driven by a holistic path to help parents heal their stories and connect with and empower their children. Leah is also a Co-Founder of a nonprofit mentoring children facing life-altering conditions with creative writing.
She is available for onsite presentations of The Abundant Parent to organizations and corporate entities.
To learn more, visit: www.theAbundantParent.com
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